I have had it!

You may have heard about the piece in the New York Times about body image and women tennis players.  It set off a firestorm across social media and really left many of us shaking our heads at how a champion athlete like Serena Williams is criticized for looking ATHLETIC.  Here’s an excerpt from that article.

 During an appearance on Home Shopping Network for her clothing line, Williams said that one particular long-sleeved garment would help her go unnoticed in public.
“My arms are really fit, but I wanted to cover them, because when I do people don’t recognize me as much,” – Serena Williams
Williams, who will be vying for the Wimbledon title against Garbiñe Muguruza on Saturday, has large biceps and a mold-breaking muscular frame, which packs the power and athleticism that have dominated women’s tennis for years. Her rivals could try to emulate her physique, but most of them choose not to.
Despite Williams’s success — a victory Saturday would give her 21 Grand Slam singles titles and her fourth in a row — body-image issues among female tennis players persist, compelling many players to avoid bulking up.
“It’s our decision to keep her as the smallest player in the top 10,” said Tomasz Wiktorowski, the coach of Agnieszka Radwanska, who is listed at 5 feet 8 and 123 pounds. “Because, first of all she’s a woman, and she wants to be a woman.”

That’s enough of that article.  One question before we proceed any further.  How many men do you know that look like this?  As J.K. Rowling said to a Twitter Troll about Serena in this outfit:

“Yeah my husband looks like this in a dress.  You’re an idiot.”

I Could not have said it better myself.

What does it say that even a woman who is considered one of this generation’s greatest athlete’s is being criticized because she looks like a champion athlete?

It’s ridiculous but a symptom of a much larger problem:  An industry that makes it’s money off of insecurity, self loathing, and a narrow definition of what is right and attractive.

This industry is called the beauty/fitness industry and it’s causing women more harm than good.  Let’s look at the very real health/cosmetic benefit of strength training.

But I don’t want to bulk up…

Women must strength train.  There is no way around it.  From a functional standpoint, women must strength train because muscle supports the joints and if you have no strength, then you have very little function.  The reason you can’t walk further than a block is because you have no strength.  The reason you can’t open jars, carry groceries, or play with your kids is because you don’t have enough strength.  The reason you have terrible balance and fall over easily is because you have weak stabilization strength.  The reason you are in pain is because your musculature is weak and you most likely are compensating.  Muscle is also more metabolically active which means you will burn more calories even at rest.
From a purely cosmetic standpoint, you must strength train if you don’t want your body parts to drag the ground.  Muscle is what gives your body shape.  Fat sags and doesn’t have shape except shaped towards the ground.  If you’ve ever wondered why some people maintain a more youthful appearance is because they have higher quality muscle tone.  Yes TONE that word people use to describe lower body fat and muscle definition.  If you want to tone, then you must build muscle mass and that involves not only bodyweight but other tools such as Dumbbells, Barbells, Resistance Bands, and Kettlebells.
One of the biggest forms of resistance from clients I have encountered as a fitness coach when I tell them that they must strength train is, “But I don’t want to bulk up!”  My first reaction is That is not going to happen because women simply don’t possess the hormones to turn into He-Man.  Women who have high levels of developed muscularity have dieted and trained FOR YEARS to get that way and yes they have had some “help” along the way.  If you don’t plan on standing onstage and flexing, then you don’t need to worry about it because you aren’t going to train nor diet that way.  Besides that it takes YEARS to look like that.  It doesn’t happen overnight.
My second response is a bit more snippy:  “If you don’t strength train, then you WILL bulk up but it will be with body fat.” As we age, muscles atrophy and we do begin to lose muscle mass UNLESS we take action by strength training.  If you don’t want to be sagging and drooping, then you need to strength train or you will bulk up with body fat.
Ordinarily I hate these types of Fitness Memes but this one is so true.
For some reason we have been programmed that it would be better to bulk up with body fat than with lean muscle mass which has functional purposes and will  also help you to look better.  Yet this is frowned upon and I can never understand why until I see these stupid comments about female athletes I understand why women are so afraid of bulking up.

Why this is hurting women:  Never Good Enough

If you ask women if they are happy with their bodies, then they will say No.  Myself included.  We never think we are good enough even if we are healthy and vibrant!  As I said last week, I don’t know who is spreading these lies that men only like skinny and frail looking women because that is not my experience nor the people I know.  Men worth partnering with are concerned with character and who you are as a person but THAT is for another day.
Women are constantly bombarded with the fact that they are not good enough.  Even some of your favorite women who are celebrated by the media get it when they gain weight and I’m sure if you asked many of these “perfect” women if they are completely happy with their appearance, then they would say No.  It is all an illusion

I am Not Good Enough

Even at one of my lowest weights, I still complained.
The message women are constantly getting is that We are Never Good Enough.  Even when I was down 22 pounds last year, it wasn’t good enough.  I still found something to complain about.  Some brag about being perfectionists but I think that is foolish.  There is no perfect and the more you set something that doesn’t exist as a goal, the more frustrated, stressed out, and unhappy you will be.
We will never be good enough if we listen to the popular  media and most fitness experts and do you know why?

Dollars and Cents

If we think we are good enough, then we won’t BUY anything. I will never forget a class that I took in college where the professor said that the reason television exists is to sell advertising.  If people felt that they were enough, then they wouldn’t need to rush out and buy all the latest crap that’s for sale.   The fitness industry would really be at a loss.  What would all the gurus, snake oil salesmen, and magic bean pushers do for income?  They would actually have to begin to address the deeper issues of WHY people have the habits that they do and much of it has nothing to do with willpower.

We need a new message and to say something different

It’s time to say something different.  As I have said and will address in Part 2 of this series, Women are the main members of the body fascist police.  It isn’t men that are the cause of the body shaming and weight police.
What does it mean when one of the greatest athletes of our generation is criticized for looking like it?
What does it mean when women say I would rather be thin and lose rather than look athletic and win?

Real Life Application

What does it mean when women say I won’t strength train because I don’t want to bulk up even though I don’t possess the hormones to do so?
I would rather lose function and not be able to move rather than take the chance of getting stronger by strength training.
I would rather bulk up with body fat than the possibility of looking strong.
Raise your hand if you are with me that we need a new message and to say something different.  It starts with us as women and especially those of us in the health/fitness industry.
Part 2 tomorrow…