During the 2025 Fall Push, one of the YouTube girlies I follow had us make a list of what makes us feel good. I started reading romance books during the COVID-19 pandemic in 2020 and have continued to do so since then. I really enjoy romantic comedies. I am also loving that there are so many romance books by Black authors these days because I can identify with the unique struggles of the characters. 

Since I plan to write a second-chance love story, I find these books inspirational and enjoy the different themes each author explores in their writing. I wanted to share some of my favorite romance books this year and some of my insights!

Red String Theory, Lauren Kung Jessen

I had never heard of Red String Theory until one of the YouTube girlies mentioned it. I bought this romance novel called Red String Theory by Lauren Kung Jessen, and I was pleasantly surprised. I loved the story of the free-spirited Rooney Gao and the straight-laced Jackson Liu, who may or may not be brought together by the Red Thread of Fate.  I also enjoyed learning about Chinese legends and traditions, such as a lantern party.  Isn’t it cool that romance novels now encompass different cultures?

The Red Thread of Fate is a Chinese legend in which the god of love and marriage connects two people by the ankles with a red thread. Those two people are then destined lovers, regardless of place, time, or circumstances. The magical string may stretch or tangle, but never break. Rooney is a firm believer in the red string theory, which states that fate brings two soulmates together, while Jackson believes that we can choose our own fate.

Fate or Choice?

The book poses one of the most profound questions regarding love and romance.  Did fate bring people together, or did they choose one another?

Rooney is sold on the Red String Theory, but her mother, Wren Gao, points out that she did not teach Rooney about the Red Thread of Fate to keep her from living and loving, but to remember that bigger things are happening in the world beyond ourselves. We can influence the world, but the world can also affect us.

I don’t necessarily believe in soulmates and all of that because we can meet people, and there is incredible energy between us, but that doesn’t mean it is meant to be a lifelong connection. It could be pheromones or primal sexual attraction. Neither of those things is sufficient to sustain a long-term relationship.

As the philosopher Lao-Tzu said, The Flame that burns twice as bright burns half as long.

This is where I agree with the practical character Jackson that we must choose to partner with someone and put in the work for the relationship to last.

Here I go getting churchy again: I believe that some things are divinely ordered and may come together in the most unexpected of ways. As Rooney puts it in the book, “It is downright scary sometimes how close we are to alternate life paths without knowing.”  What if we had never taken that class and met that person who eventually became our spouse? What if we had not taken that job, and our colleague hadn’t forced us to go to that happy hour, and we hadn’t met that person from another department whom we eventually fell in love with? Then there are incredible stories about how people have seen someone in a dream, only to meet them in real life. I know one couple where the woman saw her eventual husband in her dream, and they have now been married for fifty-four years. Even still, with all the star-crossed signs, one must choose not to run away and give the other star-crossed lover a chance.

A Second Chance

The Red String Theory states that two people on opposite ends of a string will come together, even after years of tangling and stretching, but never breaking. I find this concept fascinating because so few people ever get a second chance with someone they may have been genuinely curious about or had a connection with. The love story I plan to write will be a second-chance romance.

The way my life is going, I may need to use my imagination to make this happen. Unfortunately, the older I get, the more cynical I am becoming. I am at the age where many of my peers’ marriages are ending due to a myriad of factors. As someone who has never been married, I am becoming more and more indifferent to the idea of relationships and marriage because it seems like a lot of risk with little reward, except if the union results in the birth of children. In my case, my window for having children has passed, so I see even less reason to get married.

It would take an act of God for me even to want to put in any effort to choose to partner with anyone. Due to my own bad choices, my life has already been constrained, confined, and limited for ten years; I am unwilling to allow another person to cage me in even further., I refuse to put in any effort to meet anyone because I don’t want it that badly, and I want to devote my energy to finding a better job, finding a creative outlet, and traveling.

In the past few years, in particular, there have been zero inklings of Red Strings of Fate in my path, but there is always hope.

I will take the advice of Rooney, the true believer of The Red String Theory.

May Fate bring us close enough to choose.