Three-Day Fast

Even though I’ve stepped away from organized religion for the foreseeable future, I am still very much in tune with my spiritual life and had a sense to fast as the seasons shifted from Summer to Fall. The Autumnal Equinox occurred on September 22, 2025, which also coincided with the Jewish Holiday of Rosh Hashanah, marking the New Year according to the Hebrew calendar. Back in my ministry days, I would lead my prayer group in a three-day fast and prayer meetings for Rosh Hashanah. We are no longer under the old covenant, but Jesus observed Jewish traditions, and so did the early church. I admire the way the Jewish faith adheres to tradition and ritual. There is something sacred and unifying about a community coming together on these special days of the year.

“Perfect timing!” I thought to myself when I saw that the days I chose to fast all lined up perfectly with the shift in seasons and the holiday. For all those who may worry that I am drifting into paganism, please read your Bibles. God commanded festivals and holidays to coincide with the moon cycle and seasons.

Additionally, Christians should be more attuned to the Earth and honor the laws of nature. The Lord gave it to us to take care of and steward, not ruin it and ignore the laws of nature.

My three-day fast consisted of liquids only until 5 pm every day, and I refrained from tech distractions, such as Reddit and message boards. I also planned to get up every morning at 4:45 AM for study, prayer, and writing.

The first day started with a jolt.

The first morning was a fail, an Earthquake in the middle of the night, and I didn’t go back to sleep for a while.

In fact, at about 3 am, I ended up googling the name I saw in my August 8 dream. I hadn’t looked again because I hadn’t searched since then. Had I imagined the results the first time? I was half asleep and startled by the randomness of that name after more than twenty years had passed. I have a wild imagination at times, so maybe I had imagined the whole thing.

I didn’t imagine it.

I refused to do any more internet stalking because it serves no purpose except to compare my life to what I see online, which may not even be true. Sometimes, other people’s lives and circumstances are not what they seem. Years ago, I had a sense that I should not be envious regarding a particular situation, but instead pray for those involved. A few years later, I discovered the truth about the problem, and it was awful. After that, I learned not to believe everything people say and post on the internet.

Instead of going down the rabbit hole of Google and making up a wild story from an out-of-context internet search, I decided to say a prayer for this individual and move on.

On the first day of the fast, I attended a yoga class from one of my favorite instructors. The intention I set for the class was surrender. During the class, our instructor, Rebecca, repeatedly emphasized to us the importance of letting go of outcomes. I have a hard time with that because I don’t like surprises and I want to control the outcome, but as I have learned, we have far less control over outcomes than we like to believe.

The intention of surrender was not just for the class, but also for my life. I am ready to let go of some of my rigid beliefs and behaviors that I used as a means of control. I want to let go and flow from one moment to the next. As the Toni Braxton song says, “Just let go, let it flow. Everything is going to work out right, you know.”

The Lesson from the Fast: REST

On the second day of the fast, I overslept again, and I decided that I needed the rest instead of trying to be productive. I also began to doze off during my break from work. I did not realize I was so tired. That evening, I fell asleep while I was reading my book.

I understood the message that I was getting during the fast: Rest. I want my circumstances to change so badly that I am exhausting myself trying to force a change. My job is to take steps forward every day and recognize that every moment of the last ten years has been preparing me for the next era of my life.

While events may feel serendipitous, they are often a result of preparation and opportunity coming together at the right time.

I am resting in faith that God is in control.

I am resting in the knowing that change will come at the right moment.

I am resting in the process that needs to be completed for me to receive and maintain the gifts of the next era of my life.

Physically, I feel rested and more energized.

Mentally, I feel lighter and more hopeful that there is light at the end of the tunnel.

One nugget I am taking away from the fast is to declare Monday a Tech free day: That day none of the distractions like Reddit or Message boards. I am much more productive without them!

BIG WIN DEBT ONE DEBT SNOWBALL COMPLETED

ONE DEBT SNOWBALL COMPLETED!!!
TWO MORE TO GO!!!

I haven’t taken an extended vacation in a long time, and I want to do it because I am so ready to transition out of my current job. I have contemplated taking a sabbatical from training since my mother passed away, but financially, I want to do the right thing and set myself up for success.

With the completion of this Debt Snowball, I am one step closer to achieving my financial goals, which will enable me to take this sabbatical. I have two more payments to complete, in addition to ensuring I have sufficient funds for my 2025 tax bill and estimated taxes for Q1 of 2026. This is all well within reach. If I can achieve these financial goals, then I will take time off from training and hopefully not return.

There’s an exit strategy in place, and I no longer feel stuck. I am starting to feel more energized.

It’s not about the food.

Years ago, I went to several eating psychology workshops and even a retreat, and the common theme was that compulsive eating, overeating, and even restrictive eating are not about the food; the food is simply a coping strategy we use to numb our pain, comfort ourselves, or fill the emptiness in our lives.

Many of our bad food habits are not about the food itself, but rather the feeling we hope to achieve with it. I wanted to experience the feeling of enjoyment because I felt stuck, ruminating on regrets, and tired of the same old, boring environment every day.

My depressive symptoms have been lifting slowly but surely. I have restarted taking my vitamins (including Vitamin D). I have also been taking the supplement St. John’s Wort for the last month, since it has been shown to help with depressive symptoms. I do feel better overall, but this could be due to a combination of factors, such as feeling that there is a light at the end of the tunnel, reducing my phone time, and cutting back on sugar consumption.

The first two weeks of a new fitness program and plan are the most challenging because the focus is on breaking unproductive habits and establishing new, productive ones. It’s much easier to keep doing what we’ve been doing. I’m on my third week, and my bad habits are growing quieter, while my good habits are getting louder. I’ve gone back to my old school staple of Pellegrino with Lime. A big clue that my brain is beginning to shift is that I was able to pass on carrot cake, which is my favorite! Trader Joe’s has carrot cake mini sheet cakes, and I didn’t pick one up. They had them earlier this year, around Easter, and I had complained to one of the employees that they needed to bring them back. Of course, they brought back those carrot mini sheet cakes when I’m not actively trying to eat too much sugar.

Nicole Wilkins’ Level Up Five-Week Challenge is on

I haven’t done a Nicole Wilkins Challenge in a long time, and I feel like I am in the right headspace to take it on, especially since it’s only five weeks. I always feel like with these types of challenges, the point is the process. I always get something out of them, whether it is trying new recipes, incorporating new exercises, adding more meal preparation to my weekly routine, or simply fulfilling a commitment I’ve made to myself. The results are just the icing on the cake. The first fitness challenge I ever did encouraged people to stay off the scale for at least four weeks. He wanted people to focus on establishing their habits and turning the nutrition and workout plan into a lifestyle, rather than worrying about weight loss. By the end of twelve weeks, it was more about the good habits that were acquired than the results, even though seeing the results of the hard work was pretty sweet!

We begin on October 6!!