Ten years ago, I swore off dieting for good.  After a failed experiment to compete in a fitness show, I had gotten down to my lowest weight, but I felt terrible and developed some disordered eating habits.  Getting down to my lowest weight did not solve my problems, and I came to the understanding that as women, we will never feel good enough in our bodies if we are constantly striving for unrealistic and unsustainable ideals around thinness and even fitness.

Back then, I was so tired of being at war with my body and trying to beat it into submission with dieting and over-exercising that I vowed to give up dieting for good. In the ten years since that vow, being thin has not been my priority. My health has been my priority because I have had some health issues that needed medical attention. I had surgery for my reproductive system and I was diagnosed with a mild form of Crohn’s disease.  My focus with Crohn’s has been on avoiding inflammatory foods and those that irritate my digestive system, and getting on the proper medication to manage the Crohn’s.

I suffered a significant personal loss, and so my focus is on exercising to help me feel good and monitoring myself to make sure that I am not using food as a coping mechanism as I grieve.  I am also intentional about eating well and exercising to prevent chronic disease and illness because I may be at higher risk due to genetics.

Truthfully, I am a few pounds heavier than I’d like to be, but that’s not my major priority. I am now over 40 years old, transitioning into a new career, and envisioning what my future looks like in this new normal.  Being a size 4 is not something I want to invest a lot of time in at this point in my life.

Mel Robbins recently had Dr Stacy  Sims on her podcast. (Link at the end of the blog post)  Dr. Sims is a researcher with Stanford University and is an international exercise physiologist and nutrition scientist.  She talked about the hormonal differences between men and women when it comes to exercising and nutrition., While listening to this podcast, I started to realize how much diet culture was sneaking back into my life.  Even though I wasn’t on a weight loss program, I was still clinging to the principles of under-eating and over-exercising with the underlying idea that thin is the goal.

After listening to this podcast for twenty minutes, I realized how much I was doing wrong, and the sad part is – I KNOW BETTER.  

After just two weeks of applying the tips Dr. Sims shared on the podcast, I had a revelation that my low energy and decrease in strength were not due to being in my 40s and “getting old.”  It was because I was not fueling myself properly, and I had the wrong mindset

Two weeks in and so much has changed!  I’m back up before 6 am to exercise three mornings a week, I can lift heavier again, and I’m no longer “tired but wired,” as Dr Sims put it.  

Here are Three Tips I have put into practice that have changed the game for me.

Nutrition: No More Fasted Workouts and Increasing Protein Intake

It’s an old-school gym science principle that fasted cardio will tap into fat stores and burn more fat.  I prefer to exercise early in the morning so that I can do fasted strength and cardio workouts (except for an energy drink).  I would tell myself that I was accelerating fat loss.

I did buy Dr. Stacy Sims’ book, Roar, so that I will dig deeper into this, but from the podcast, I learned that fasted workouts do not work for women.  When women first get up in the mornings, their cortisol levels are high, and cortisol is a stress hormone whose receptors are on our bellies (which is why when we’re stressed, we gain belly fat). Exercise is a stressor, so we get up, do a fasted workout, and stress our systems out even more!  We need fuel, not stress, for morning workouts.  

I remember reading studies about fasted workouts, and the fat loss results were not as impressive as gym science would predict.  Those studies were also conducted on young college-aged men, rather than women.  Other studies have shown that when fueled before workouts, people exercise more intensely and have a calorie burn. 

I’m done with fasted workouts.  I exercise early in the morning, and I don’t like anything heavy in my system, so my choices are 

½ banana

½ protein bar

½ protein shake 

 ½ protein coffee  

Protein coffee has become the GOAT.  I love my coffee, and protein coffee is SO easy, I cannot believe I haven’t done this sooner.  The night before, I mix up oat milk (you can use whatever milk you like) and protein powder.  The next morning I add Trader Joe’s Iced Coffee to the mix and it is so good.  You can have it before your AM workout, for breakfast, and I’ve been using it as my mid-morning or mid-afternoon snack.

We want to start the day with 30 grams of protein, and protein coffee is a way to do that. I have found that having protein coffee as a snack results in less grazing and snacking, as the protein helps me feel full.  My energy is also stable because my blood sugar levels are not crashing.  Plus I save money by not buying an Iced Coffee with sugar free vanilla syrup.

With the extra protein in my diet, I have better recovery from my workouts, and I am much more energized throughout the day.

Workouts: Strength Increases, and I can still hang

I told myself that the reason I was not lifting as heavy as I once did and the reason I didn’t have as much energy was that I am now over 40.  I am getting old and the old gray mare just ain’t what she used to be.

Somebody told a lie one day.

After just two weeks of non-fasted workouts and increased protein intake, I am back to pressing 30-pound dumbbells and rowing with 40-pound dumbbells.  My workouts have gone from flaming out after 45-50 minutes to having to end them because I can keep going. For the most part, I no longer do long workouts because I believe there’s a point where the law of diminishing returns applies. Further disproving the “old gray mare ain’t out of the game,” for the first time in years, I was even able to do two-a-day workouts: Strength in the morning and cardio in the evening.  I did it to prove to myself that I could.  

I am back to morning workouts 3 times per week. I generally strength train in the mornings, and if I can go to the gym, I will strength train and do 15 minutes of cardio.  Dr. Stacy T Sims recommended 10 mins of cardio burst.  I will do a 5-minute warm-up, a 30-second Burst, and 90 seconds of recovery for 10 minutes on the treadmill or spin bike.  When the 30-second bursts are done correctly, the 90-second recovery is needed.  I do enjoy longer runs/walks, but that’s more for mental health, so I do that as well.

Mindset: Feel energized in my body

So, how much weight have you lost?

I don’t know and I don’t care.  I set a goal for the next three months to feel energized in my body.  I want to feel strong and vibrant. I don’t care about my weight.  All I know is that I can zip up my pants.

I will not weigh myself for three months because I do not want to become distracted and get off track by thinking I should be looking for a certain number..  

I have been listening to empowering music to motivate myself, both in and out of the gym.  Two of my favorites are Megan the Stallion, “Her,” and Victoria Monet, “On My Mama.”  I feel like all women should have a playlist to uplift and celebrate themselves. 

 I walk around daily singing

I put that on my own mama

On my hood

I look fly

I look good

You can’t touch my bag

Wish you could

I look fly

I look too good

Being in the fitness industry for so long and training women, I know this much is true – women are rarely happy with their bodies and are always picking themselves apart.  Even if they are thin, they think they should be thinner.  If they’ve gained a few pounds, then they’re talking down about themselves despite killing it at work, managing their families, raising children, and everything else.  Marketers prey on women’s insecurities by promising thinness, beauty, and happiness in a bottle or the latest product.

I’m not here for that.  I’m here for being energized in my body, feeling vibrant, and empowered.

Times are serious.  We need to take care of our health, both mentally and physically.  We must prioritize what matters, and it is not some magic number on the scale.