Get rid of the Fluff

This may come off as a cantankerous and ornery post but I just feel the need to say it.

Is that all right?

I’m sick of the Fluff.

No not the “fluff” people like to complain about on their bodies otherwise known as excess body fat, but I’m talking about the fluff that I see and hear daily.

Fluff Definition

entertainment or writing perceived as trivial or superficial.

Boom.

Living Online has a fatal flaw…

It’s Not Real

(Say it again G For those People in the Back)

It’s Not Real

Social media isn’t reality. People can tell you whatever story they choose to tell you and you’re none the wiser. It’s not the real world. People can create all sorts of fake personas to live through online and you don’t have a clue.

You may be saying: “Well people can pretend in the real world as well. They can carefully construct an image they want to portray in the real world as well so it’s not just online”

You’re absolutely right but I’ve found that you get found out so much quicker in the real world because people know you, they can see you, stuff starts not adding up, and eventually it all falls down.

Online I can make myself out to be whomever I want and say whatever I want. To be honest with you one of the ways people separate the fluff from the real is REAL WORLD APPLICATION. If what they are telling you doesn’t work in the REAL WORLD, then most likely it’s fluff.

Let’s talk about the most common sources of Fluff and how not to get sucked in

Fake and Artificial Happiness
But it SOUNDS good
No Nutrients and No Substance

Fake and Artificial Happiness

If you look at some social media feeds, every day is full of rainbows and unicorns. These people fancy themselves as motivators and encouragers but it’s all fluff. It’s superficial and trivial. It also comes across as fake, phony, and inauthentic.

Every day is not sunshine and rainbows and you do not need to fake your happiness in order to keep up appearances.

A few years ago I followed a person whose posts were always happy and everything was just beyond awesome. Well one day this person broke down and admitted that things were NOT awesome and was suffering IN REAL LIFE. When the person used that phrase REAL LIFE it really hit me.

Not the Real World: REAL TALK FOR REAL PROBLEMS

Let me tell you something.

In my last 10 years of working with people, I know that people are STRUGGLING on their life journeys. People have REAL issues. There are women being physically and mentally abused, Veterans suffering from PTSD, people suffering in toxic relationships, marriages falling apart, children going crazy, folks dealing with addiction issues, suicidal, isolated, and the list goes on.

I know people who want to be encouragers mean well. I know they have good hearts and want to be positive and uplifting but living in fantasy land is not the answer. We’ve got to get REAL about the pain that people are facing.

This is where I’m different as a coach. I’m not coaching people with Happy Happy Joy Joy posts. I’m giving REAL TALK for REAL ISSUES.

When you give REAL TALK for REAL ISSUES you get REAL RESPONSES. I love some of the responses I’ve gotten in my accountability group regarding people GOING DEEP within themselves to become more self aware.

A real motivator knows to get to the root of the issues that people are facing, not faking happiness to keep up appearances.

You can’t believe everything you see on social media

I want to emphasize that you cannot believe everything you see on social media. The person posting all the happy clappy stuff and Motivational stuff may be struggling behind the scenes. You don’t know so I would advise you to take it all with a grain of salt. As the great Whitney Houston once said:

“Show me the receipts”

If what the person is saying is true, then they will have receipts. They will have the facts to back up their claims. Although I must warn you again: social media is not the best gauge for this because people can tell you any story they want to tell you.

Choose wisely.

But it Sounds Good…

The reason Fluff is so popular is because it sounds good and makes us feel good for the moment. People like it when you tell them what they want to hear and what they want to believe is true. We want to believe that our lives will change if we buy x,y,z. We want to believe these empty slogans that provide no real solutions to our mindsets. We want to believe fantasies that people tell us because they sound so good.

Which of these do you think would be more popular?

Scenario 1: If you want to sustainably lose fat, then the process will take a year of consistent effort. You’ll need to completely revamp your nutrition but the way we’ll do it is through small changes every month that will add up to big results with not only weight loss but better health overall!

Scenario 2: Do you want to lose weight FAST? I’ve got the answer!! Find out how to lose 10 pounds in 10 days!!

Most people would be more interested in Scenario 2 because it’s what we want to hear. We want to know the answer on how to lose FAT FAST. Even after all this time and disappointments with diets over the years we still want to believe that there is a Quick Fix Solution

Don’t get sucked into fluff just because it sounds good. Another example are all of these “Motivational” quotes and. When I was trying to do a fitness competition, I would follow all of these competitors who were always posting about Hardcore! No Excuses! WAR GAMES!

It was empty motivation and it sounded good and hardcore but that’s not the way to success anyway. The way to success is consistency and doing the small things every day. It’s not giving up and continuing on

Nutrient Deficient and no substance

When you eat nutrient deficient food, you’re hungry 10 minutes later. It never satisfies you and doesn’t feed your appetite.

Fluff is just like that. It has no nutrients and no substance. It’s not going to give you real answers to real problems. It’s not going to feed your soul and it’s going to leave you empty and hungry for real answers when you figure out

Solutions Not Slogans

When I visited Facebook, I loved this sign: Solutions Not Slogans

Friends, we need solutions and not feel good slogans. Real solutions can be messy, complicated, and painful to hear. Fluff has no place for real solutions because with that real solutions will lose the feel good factor.

We don’t need shallow messages of GO HARD and GO HOME.

We need messages that encourage us to GO DEEP, REFLECT,

We need messages that encourage us to ask ourselves WHAT IS IT THAT WE WANT.

We need solutions and not slogans

If want to encourage you to look beyond the fluff. Everybody is on their own journey just like you are. Don’t be fooled by deceptive fluffy marketing messages disguised as a lifestyle.

My goals are to help women:

give up dieting for good and stop yo yo dieting,
Design a Healthy Lifestyle so that they can be a high performer who can get what they want
Understand what it is that they want
Figure out what is holding them back from being successful
Encourage them to Take their power and Go Forward

You can’t do that selling Fluff…so let’s get rid of the fluff for good!