I have worked in commercial gyms for 10 years and I was tired of it.  I even thought at the beginning of 2015 that I was done with training and fitness.  My secret PUSH Goal was to go out and find a “real job” with a specific salary, benefits, and a regular schedule.  I knew that I needed to quit training at the commercial gym because I wasn’t growing and it was time to move on.  I had made the mistake before of staying at a job for too long because I was scared to move on and I didn’t want to make that same mistake again so I was thinking, “Well I really need to make a decision.”

I made my Pro/Con List and the cons of staying were way more than pros but I still was scared to pull the trigger.  This was funny because I was always convincing and encouraging clients, colleagues, and everybody else to quit their jobs but I needed my own push.

Feb of 2015 was the toughest month at the commercial gym.  I literally felt as if I had gone back down a level.  Vice President Joe Biden says, “You’re either on your way up or on you’re way down.” and after the month of Feb I can definitely say that I was on my way down.  Something needed to change.  I needed some sort of push or some word to get myself together.

On Mar 1 my sister and I headed to Shiloh Church Oakland and it was announced, “Today we will have Joseph Garlington as our guest speaker.”

I almost fell out of my seat because I KNEW I was about to hear something that I needed to.

Joseph Garlington

My Faith is #1 in my life and I believe Faith is about taking action and not sitting in a church doing nothing  Due to my religious background and experiences, I tend to be cynical and skeptical about most people calling themselves, “preachers” or “Bishops” and I will leave it at that.

Joseph Garlington was the man who spoke a LIFE CHANGING message for me at Shiloh Church about six months prior.  “It’s time to say something.” If you don’t like where your life is, then it’s time to say something different.”

On Mar 1 Joseph Garlington gets up to talk about A Set Time of Faith

A Set Time of Faith

The premise was that all that stuff that had been spoken over our lives will come true.  He said that we will like the plans but we won’t like the process and he said it is time for you to fight for your worth and you need to realize that a chicken is birthed in a few weeks but it takes longer for an elephant to be born.

However this was the one that stabbed me right in the gut

You are standing in the river of your own prosperity.  You are DAMNING your future. 

I wish I could say that I went right home and decided to quit my job the next day but I was still too afraid.  I did cross out that business about getting a “real job”.  I knew that was settling for less and that wasn’t what I was supposed to be doing.  You see I had this secret dream to write, teach, train clients, and make an IMPACT out in the world.  I just wasn’t sure how I could do it and get paid.  I knew that if I decide to quit and settle NOW that I would not be able to go for my secret dream. This is where that whole faith thing comes into play.

So I suffered on for another month but this time I started planning how I would exit stage right and developing my business plans.  I was 99.2% sure I needed to quit my job but I was too scared until I encountered Ingrid.

Ingrid

On Easter Sunday at Shiloh Church we had just come out of the awesome service when a woman approached me.  She said, “Are you looking for a job?”

I wasn’t sure where this was going so I said, “Kinda.”

Ingrid went on to say, “It’s time.  It’s time for you to do what you’ve been called to do.  It’s time for you to go forth. All the distractions in your life will be cut so you can go forward.   It’s time.  He’s with you.  Go .  All of that is within will come to pass. You’re going to have an amazing testimony to tell people.  I want you to come find me when it happens.”

That was it.  I didn’t need to hear anything else.

I went home, typed up my resignation, and had it ready for the next time I met with my boss

This is how I felt handing in my resignation

CrazyTambourineLady

Distractions

Ingrid had mentioned distractions in her prophetic word to me and I immediately realized that fitness had become a huge distraction.  I decided to enter into a time of spiritual fasting and the first thought was, “Oh no but what about my food plan”.  I was going to do the Daniel Fast which meant no meat and mostly fruits and vegetables so I mean really?  Honestly it was then that I realized that this had become an unhealthy obsession and it was time to move on.  Right after I finished the fast I went to the Nor Cal Fitness Summit, talked with Chrissy, and I abandoned the fitness competition goals and decided to get my mind right.

The self obsessive fitness stuff was a distraction from what was really bothering me and that was all my perceived failures and this endless attempt to fix myself.  Enough was enough on that front too and so began the journey of confronting those deep seeded issues which I got to work through at the eating psychology workshops and counseling session.  It’s also where I started to become more outspoken about women, body image, and disordered eating.

What’s Clearly Next

It gets better.

The same day I handed in my resignation my dear friend Stefanie arranged for me to attend a focus group.  I didn’t know what this was going to be about, but I went anyway.  Well guess what the subject matter was?  It was about people who quit their jobs and needed to figure out what their next steps were.  That was an amazing experience because no matter our age or income level we were all still trying to figure it out.  People at high levels talked about how they were taking a break because they had draining experiences and one woman who was more mature said, “I’m still trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up.”  Wow.  So many of us think we’re failures because we don’t have it all figured out but does anybody have it all figured out?

I don’t think so but that’s not the point.

The point is not to figure it out but to be in the flow of the process instead of wallowing in the mire, fighting circumstances, and being a victim.

Things haven’t been perfect at all since I quit but I would do it again because little by little I am seeing puzzle pieces of my dream coming together.  It still doesn’t make sense but that’s part of the fun.

I look forward to sharing my journey because as Pastor Patrick Kiteley says, “You have to LIVE IT to be able to GIVE IT”.  If I want to be a credible teacher, then I have to be able to live what I’m teaching.  As the late, great Whitney Houston once said, “Show me the receipts.  Where are the receipts?”  If I am going to teach anybody anything, then I have to have receipts.

If you’ve got a secret dream in your heart, then take a risk.  They say we only have one shot at this life so why not do like Bon Jovi and Go Down in a Blaze of Glory instead of settling for a Get By Option.  Remember these words.

You are standing in the river of your own prosperity.  You are DAMNING your future.